Useful Phrases when kidnapped by Al-Qaeda

"Akbar khali-kili haftir lotfan."
-- Thank you for showing me your marvelous gun.

"Fehr gabul cardan davat paeh gush divar."
-- I am delighted to accept your kind invitation to lie down on the floor with my arms above my head.

"Shomaeh fekr tamomeh oeh gofteh bande."
-- I agree with everything that you have ever said or thought of in your entire life.

"Auto arraregh davateman mano sepaheh-hast."
-- It is exceptionally kind of you to allow me to travel in the trunk of your car.

"Fashel-eh tupehman na degat mano goftam cheeshayeh mohemara jebehkeshvarhman."
-- If you do me the honour of not harming my genital appendages, I will gladly reciprocate by betraying my country in public.

"Khrel, jepahen maneh va jayeii amrikahey."
-- I will tell you the names and addresses of many American spies travelling as reporters.

"Balli, balli, balli!"
-- Whatever you say!

"Maternier ghermex ahlieh, ghorban."
-- The red blindfold would be lovely, Excellency.

"Tkieh-nuneh ba ob khrelleh bezorg va khrube boyast inc begeram."
-- The water-soaked bread crumbs are delicious, thank you. I must have the recipe.

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